Non-members, non-posting members and general coyness

Anything that doesn't fit anywhere else, but that's still CH related.

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jfdawson
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Post by jfdawson »

As someone who has only posted here from time to time, but have "lurked" a bit more frequently than that, I can only offer my own rationale for behaving as I do, but it may be similar to some others at least.

First off, I'm not at all averse to the internet: in fact, I am a regular (i.e. several times a week) contributor to two different message boards, use Facebook, rely on the web heavily for work etc. So there's no problem with that.

I am aware, however, that there are only so many hours in a day (and increasingly fewer free hours for me), and a lot of things I'd like to do. My experience of other message boards tells me that they are at their most interesting (for me, at any rate) when you get involved in serious debate, or even light-hearted banter, with other members. This, however, requires commitment of time. Frequently I have read posts on here, thought about replying, and then decided against it - purely because it would ultimately lead to me spending more time involved in a debate, which I know I can't afford.

Some of you are probably asking at this point: why the other message boards rather than this one? Well, I think it's due to the subject matter. The boards that I contribute to regularly are both football-related, and this means there is a naturally occurring set of new discussion material all the time (e.g. results/performances!). The subjects discussed are not limited to this, but it does give more impetus to log in on a regular basis; in contrast, there are relatively few "natural" occurrences that lead to new threads on this board, and therefore it's down to forum members to introduce their own topics and keep the interest up. If this wanes, then it may be several weeks before I look again (not for any deliberate reason: just because I'm busy doing other things, and/or forget about it - there are a further couple of message boards that I am a member of with which I do the same).

One other comment: some people have mentioned the "cliquey" feel that this board can give off, and I agree. That is not a criticism at all: one of the other boards I contribute to has a very similar feel (and I suspect most do, to some degree); it is a scenario that grows organically. But again, it can be off-putting to some I believe. It comes back to the investment of time thing, I think: if people believe that in order to be a "full" member of a board, they need to get to know the other posters well enough to engage in such banter, then they may not be so bothered about trying. I've never seen a situation on here where someone new to the board hasn't been welcomed, so I'm pretty sure this is due to the mentality of the lurkers rather than the observed behaviour of regular posters, but it could be an explanation.

I would like to finish this post by saying, however, that despite being a very occasional contributor, I am very pleased that this forum exists, and so do want to thank Julian and everyone else who keeps it going: even though I may not be here very often, it's nice to be able to drop in once in a while!
Jeremy Dawson
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Post by Mid A 15 »

Good post Jeremy.

Are you still touring churches with your cello?
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jfdawson
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Post by jfdawson »

Mid A 15 wrote:Good post Jeremy.

Are you still touring churches with your cello?
:lol:

Not churches this year: in fact, that was limited to a 12-day stretch last year. We did do a "Monopoly Board challenge" a few weeks ago: performing at each of the 22 streets on the Monopoly board in a day. But we're saving ourselves for another big one next year: playing at the peaks of the tallest mountains in England, Scotland, Wales and Ireland...
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J.R.
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Post by J.R. »

I think it's El Plummo's turn this year, touring chapels with his Piccolo !

(No jokes about Organs and Cathedral's, perleeez !)
John Rutley. Prep B & Coleridge B. 1958-1963.
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Post by Katharine »

jfdawson wrote: But we're saving ourselves for another big one next year: playing at the peaks of the tallest mountains in England, Scotland, Wales and Ireland...
Do let me know when you are coming this way. Which route do you intend for Snowdon?
Katharine Dobson (Hills) 6.14, 1959 - 1965
jfdawson
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Post by jfdawson »

Katharine wrote:Do let me know when you are coming this way. Which route do you intend for Snowdon?
I'll post details up here a few weeks in advance, but our planned date for Snowdon at the moment is July 27th (Sunday). We'll probably take the Llanberis path, simply because it'll be easiest with the cellos. If it were up to me, I'd opt for Crib Goch! Not sure the cello insurance would like that, though...
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Post by blondie95 »

jfdawson wrote:One other comment: some people have mentioned the "cliquey" feel that this board can give off, and I agree. That is not a criticism at all: one of the other boards I contribute to has a very similar feel (and I suspect most do, to some degree); it is a scenario that grows organically. But again, it can be off-putting to some I believe. It comes back to the investment of time thing, I think: if people believe that in order to be a "full" member of a board, they need to get to know the other posters well enough to engage in such banter, then they may not be so bothered about trying. I've never seen a situation on here where someone new to the board hasn't been welcomed, so I'm pretty sure this is due to the mentality of the lurkers rather than the observed behaviour of regular posters, but it could be an explanation.
I agreed with you post, although would like to point out one thing to do with the above.I and probably many others started out on this forum as sepctators and i did find it a but cliquey(lots of in the know jokes etc that i didnt understand) but once i found a topic that i could put comment to and people responded I posted more and more. I still dont know all the jokes between members but what i do know is that as I read the posts and followed them things all made sense.

Also out of the regular posters i am the only one i think from my year group and I actually only know (met) around 3 of these other regulars.
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Post by sejintenej »

blondie95 wrote:I agreed with you post, although would like to point out one thing to do with the above.I and probably many others started out on this forum as sepctators and i did find it a but cliquey(lots of in the know jokes etc that i didnt understand) but once i found a topic that i could put comment to and people responded I posted more and more. I still dont know all the jokes between members but what i do know is that as I read the posts and followed them things all made sense.

Also out of the regular posters i am the only one i think from my year group and I actually only know (met) around 3 of these other regulars.
Certainly there is by chance a group of ladies who knew each other at Hertford and can discuss what was, for most of us, an unknown world. That does not stop them posting on other threads where they find they have something to say. Equally there are groups of men who knew each other but the same applies. For my part I remember just one member of the Forum - who does not post - whilst one other was during my years. Does that stop me posting? No way.

Forget the cliques (if they actually exist) - if you have anything to write then write it!
What happens if a politician drowns in a river? That is pollution.
What happens if all of them drown? That is solution!!!
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icomefromalanddownunder
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Post by icomefromalanddownunder »

sejintenej wrote:Certainly there is by chance a group of ladies who knew each other at Hertford and can discuss what was, for most of us, an unknown world. That does not stop them posting on other threads where they find they have something to say. Equally there are groups of men who knew each other but the same applies. For my part I remember just one member of the Forum - who does not post - whilst one other was during my years. Does that stop me posting? No way.

Forget the cliques (if they actually exist) - if you have anything to write then write it!
Me thinks that the cliques exist only in the minds of the non-posters.

I am very happy that some of my Hertford contemporaries regularly contribute to the list, but I, and I'm sure the others, don't consider ourselves a clique, and am more than happy when anyone joins in, with a question, joke, sarcastic comment, whatever.

Like Amy, I posted tentatively at first, testing the water, but soon plunged in, and apart from the occasional slightly rude response, which I put down to the responder having a bad day, rather than a slight on myself, I can't think of anything negative to say about the forum.

xxx
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Post by Mid A 15 »

icomefromalanddownunder wrote:
sejintenej wrote:Certainly there is by chance a group of ladies who knew each other at Hertford and can discuss what was, for most of us, an unknown world. That does not stop them posting on other threads where they find they have something to say. Equally there are groups of men who knew each other but the same applies. For my part I remember just one member of the Forum - who does not post - whilst one other was during my years. Does that stop me posting? No way.

Forget the cliques (if they actually exist) - if you have anything to write then write it!
Me thinks that the cliques exist only in the minds of the non-posters.
I am very happy that some of my Hertford contemporaries regularly contribute to the list, but I, and I'm sure the others, don't consider ourselves a clique, and am more than happy when anyone joins in, with a question, joke, sarcastic comment, whatever.

Like Amy, I posted tentatively at first, testing the water, but soon plunged in, and apart from the occasional slightly rude response, which I put down to the responder having a bad day, rather than a slight on myself, I can't think of anything negative to say about the forum.

xxx
You've hit the nail on the head Caroline.

I think the perception of "cliquiness" (is there such a word?) stems from initial reticence until one becomes familiar with the "ways" of the board.

Like Jeremy I also post on a football board and a "clique" of them drink together before matches. I go with my daughter so rarely go to the Pub before the game but I don't feel any less welcome on the forum and engage in "banter" with the best of them.

Regarding this forum I read as a guest for a week or two before registering. I initially thought I was too much of an old fogie as in the early days there seemed to be more "YOBS" posting regularly. Our resident Dorking poster became more prominent though along with RR who is not so much younger than me plus some Hertford girls like Englishangel and Euterpe13 who are about my age. I therefore decided to take the plunge, register and post and haven't looked back.

I've not met any of the current "regular" posters although I know "occasional" posters like Howard Holdsworth, Peter Farnfield and Simon Kerruish. I also knew "AKAP" although he has not posted for some time.

I don't find that an obstacle though and find the Hertford threads just as fascinating as the Horsham ones.

Posting on here initially is like jumping off the top board for the first time in the swimming pool. You feel anxious but once you've done it you keep doing it.
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