Are you a pet person?

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Are you a pet person?

Yes
9
69%
No
4
31%
Does Fiona Bruce count as a pet?
0
No votes
 
Total votes: 13

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englishangel
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Are you a pet person?

Post by englishangel »

m not a pet person but I thought this deserved a thread of its own. KNowing some of you as I do I am sure it will strike a chord.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE PETS, THIS IS A TRUE STORY.
FOR THOSE THAT DON'T, IT IS A TRUE STORY.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

:

The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.

Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It i s not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.

The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.

Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:


TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:

(1) They live here. You don't.
(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.

Remember, dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
(1) eat less,
(2) don't ask for money all the time,
(3) are easier to train,
(4) normally come when called,
(5) never ask to drive the car,
(6) don't smoke or drink,
(7) don't want to wear your clothes,
(8) don't have to buy the latest fashions,
(9) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and
(10) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children ...
"If a man speaks, and there isn't a woman to hear him, is he still wrong?"
midget
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by midget »

I love it! We don't have a pet at the moment, partly because our late cat had so much personality that nothing could match him. There is also the problem of a number of extremely aggressive moggies in the area.
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J.R.
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by J.R. »

For once, Fiona didn't get my vote, though I could 'pet' her anytime !

Jan and I have a saying... 'Don't trust people who don't like pets.'

Cats, incidently are great barometers when visitors call.

Our little black Prince, Reagan, will walk in and jump on the lap of a complete stranger when he immediately senses their love of cats, OR, walk up, stop stare, lift his tail in the air and walk off with a haughty look on his face when he's ascertained their dislike !
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Tim_MaA_MidB
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by Tim_MaA_MidB »

From scorpions to owls, I've had every kind of pet that you could probably think of!
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englishangel
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by englishangel »

I don't dislike pets, as long as they are guinea pig size or larger, but never had the time to care for them properly, even our rabbits did a runner.

Animals like me too so I am NOT a bad person.
"If a man speaks, and there isn't a woman to hear him, is he still wrong?"
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by blondie95 »

How true that is, I am a Cat person, dont like dogs-have always been very apprehensive of them (bar parents in law softer than softer ladbrador!)
My cat is house bound due to have FIV which means if she had a fight with another cat she could pass it on but also if she injured herself her immune system is not strong enough to recover! Given that she is totally housebound from no fault of her own we do spoil her to make up for it!!! She does in the warmer weather go out on a lead into the garden but spends the whole time tangeling herself up round the garden furntiure-im sure just to see how annoyed we get!!

She dictates where she sleeps in the house, and changes bed every few weeks, currently its the sofa and not matter what she will sit there regardless of who or what she has to climb over to get into 'her spot'!!!
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NEILL THE NOTORIOUS
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by NEILL THE NOTORIOUS »

I have to confess to being a non-pet person --- I will explain---
I am fond of animals-- with the exception of grey squirrels, which I have mentioned on another Topic -- and have eliminated from my property by LEAD POISONING (administered through the ear !)
To return to Topic -- I refer to what I call the "Tyrrany of Pets" --
1. When you go on Holiday, your Darling, (Not the Wife) has to go to Kennels or Cattery, or to be fed by some kind neighbour, who will be devestated if the thing falls sick or dies while you are away ! This adds to the cost of the Holiday.
2. You may adore your cat, your neighbours may not, cats never defecate on their "Own" property only others !
3. Freinds are nipping off to Paris for a Function this Weekend ----"Are you coming ?" ------- !
4. Dogs need to be exercised, Summer, Winter ------! and it don't matter what the Weather, or your Health-- !
5 My dogs were fed on kibbled dog biscuit and "Unfit" meat from the Slaughterhouse, They remained in good health and worked well, until gentle retirement, and final peaceful departure. One was a racing Greyhound, which kind people used to upbraid me about, because it's ribs showed --- ! I ask you !
In other peoples houses I will nurse cats and puppies on my knee, with the appropriate stroking and ear scratching.
A few years ago, we had a large Buck Rabbit, which we took over from emigrants, this would chase cats, being VERY territorial, and on one occasion ( I wish I had had a tape recorder to hand ) a visiting lady complained "Your Rabbit is chasing my Dog ! " --- I admit it was a small dog, but that is the sort of pet I like ---- I treasure the memory. It eventually died of old age, but was great fun, having learned, on its own initiative, to sit up and beg,for Ginger Biscuits !
Any one else, who has escaped the "Tyrrany " ? please Post :axe: :lol: :lol:
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jhopgood
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by jhopgood »

I am a great believer in everyone being responsible for their acts.
So if you get a pet, it is for the length of it's life and you shouldn't overact about it making holidays more expensive etc.
I have a Jack Russell, now 13 years old, who mainly comes on holidays with us. He has his own passport and has so far traveled 3 times from Buenos Aires to Valencia, and 5 or 6 times from Valencia to the UK. He also travels around Spain with us. Curiously, continental Hotels seem happier to have pets than those in the UK.
So far, apart from the paperwork and preparation before we travel, vaccinations etc, we have had no trouble.
It does stop us going on air travel at the drop of a hat, but then they are only over the weekend, so he goes in kennels.
I've never felt it to be a hassle as I knew what I was taking on when I got him.
As a Jack Russell, he is too big for his boots and has caused me some concern when he takes on dogs bigger than himself, but they have a way of sorting out their differences, hence him drifting into old age.
He also keeps the neighbours cats out or the house and terrace, scares away the rats in the village house, and can be useful with unwelcome visitors. Never attacked them, but they are always unsure of him, and since they are unwelcome, it helps them to leave sooner rather than later.
Great dog, but I won't be replacing him as the next could well outlive me, which wouldn't be fair on him.
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Angela Woodford
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by Angela Woodford »

A new experience!

Yesterday, I completed my first morning at the Blue Cross as a Cat Socialiser.

I could hardly bear to see such lovely cats with no homes! However, I set to, and did my best with love, affection and play!

I've always loved British Shorthairs, and was enchanted to befriend a beautiful British Blue - typical chubby round face and thick plushy fur. Then there was Henry, who had tremendous dignity - a large ginger and white cat who graciously sat on my lap for some behind-the ears tickling. Two brother and sister six-month-old kittens worked as a team. One managed to knock my box of crunchy treats from an "out-of-reach" shelf, whilst the other lurked below to open the box... then - action as they both tucked in! Very clever... :roll:

I emerged, sniffing. Marley, a gloriously fluffy tuxedo cat, really loved head-butting. I must have inhaled masses of fur.

The runs were extremely well equipped with comfortable beds, scratching posts, shelves, indoors-and-outdoors options. My goodness, the Socilisation Room! It's full of toys, tunnels, secret corners, clawable cushions... terrific! The cats are assessed by animal behaviourists and vets, restored to health, neutered and microchipped - what a well-run organisation the Blue Cross is.

There was a moment when I thought a cat had had some terrible killer encounter But no - this was the incredible noise made by a slinky silver mini-snow-leopardy Bengal. Uncanny - a terrifying bloodcurdling yowl! I was pleased to meet a puss called... Munch! :o The intro on her run went something like "Munch is sweet-natured and lively. She will be a loving pet, is very affectionate and would be suitable for a household with children over eight, but no dogs..."

In four weeks, my progress will be assessed and I may be given a Blue Cross aertex shirt and a badge! Then we will discuss my introduction to dogs, and my suitability to collect contributions outside Tiverton Morrisons before Christmas!

Ferdinand sniffed me with great suspicion when I got home. :?
"Baldrick, you wouldn't recognise a cunning plan if it painted itself purple, and danced naked on top of a harpsichord singing "Cunning plans are here again.""
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by LongGone »

1. Stray cats will not be fed.

2. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

3. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with a little milk.

4. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with warm milk, yummy treats and leftover fish scraps.

5. Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent residence.

6. Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up and cuddled unnecessarily.

7. Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will absolutely not be given a name.

8. Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed inside the house at any time.

9. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except at certain times.

10. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except on days ending in "y".

11. Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up on or sharpen their claws on the furniture.

12. Stray cats will not be permitted to jump up on, or sharpen claws on the really good furniture.

13. Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture but must sharpen claws on new $114.99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

14. Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

15. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece, high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

16. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

17. Stray cats will sleep outside.

18. Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

19. Stray cats will sleep on the floor in the house.

20. Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

21. Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with non-allergenic lamb's wool pillow.

22. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

23. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the foot.

24. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers.

25. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers except at the foot.

26. Stray cats may no occupy more than 10% of the bed

27. Stray cats may no occupy more than 30% of the bed

28. Stray cats may no occupy more than 90% of the bed

29. Stray cats will not play on the desk.

30. Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

31. Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the desk when the human is asdfjjhhkl;ljfd.;oier'puyykmm4hbdm9l o9jmdskdm
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J.R.
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by J.R. »

LongGone wrote:1. Stray cats will not be fed.

2. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

3. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with a little milk.

4. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with warm milk, yummy treats and leftover fish scraps.

5. Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent residence.

6. Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up and cuddled unnecessarily.

7. Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will absolutely not be given a name.

8. Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed inside the house at any time.

9. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except at certain times.

10. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except on days ending in "y".

11. Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up on or sharpen their claws on the furniture.

12. Stray cats will not be permitted to jump up on, or sharpen claws on the really good furniture.

13. Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture but must sharpen claws on new $114.99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

14. Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

15. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece, high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

16. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

17. Stray cats will sleep outside.

18. Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

19. Stray cats will sleep on the floor in the house.

20. Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

21. Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with non-allergenic lamb's wool pillow.

22. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

23. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the foot.

24. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers.

25. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers except at the foot.

26. Stray cats may no occupy more than 10% of the bed

27. Stray cats may no occupy more than 30% of the bed

28. Stray cats may no occupy more than 90% of the bed

29. Stray cats will not play on the desk.

30. Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

31. Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the desk when the human is asdfjjhhkl;ljfd.;oier'puyykmm4hbdm9l o9jmdskdm

B-R-I-L-L-I-A-N-T !


My kind of philophosy !
John Rutley. Prep B & Coleridge B. 1958-1963.
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J.R.
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by J.R. »

ANGELA....

Please don't think I'm in the Grand-Mother and sucking eggs syndome, BUT................

.......a suggestion.

Keep clean outer clothes at home for your return from the waifs and strays, and change into them before greeting your own felines.

When I worked at cat-shows, this was the norm, as one never knows exactly what type of infections you might be carrying home.

Change asap and put your outer clothes straight in the washing machine.
John Rutley. Prep B & Coleridge B. 1958-1963.
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by sejintenej »

Dogs? I like most of them, I've owned a few and even worked with a team of them but
Cats? we've owned them and my daughter has one which just loves my lap but
Rabbits - I leave em alone because one almost killed my primary school teacher (she ate a bit of it and we thought it was marvellous because we got nearly a a week off school several times) but
Squirrels? nah, a pain (or is that a plough?) in the garden. Foxes - the same, edible dormice (look like squirrels) - see squirrels but
Horses? I catch and saddle them and even ride them but

They are like Dihydrogen oxide because
They are a health hazard.
They can kill
They are banned, every single one of them, from my presence or anywhere I might go because the combination of antihistamines and a host of other drugs which you pay the NHS to provide me with will not keep me going should I smell them or inhale their scurf
a pet person? of course simply because I don't want to have them put down
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NEILL THE NOTORIOUS
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by NEILL THE NOTORIOUS »

Having posted, earlier, about the "Tyranny of Pets" I have to confess that TBA and myself, have fallen into the trap -----

Living opposite to us are two black Labradors, George and Bruno,

George adores Cheese, and has had his nose rapped, more than once, by a mousetrap.

They are different ages, and George, being the younger, and more adventurous, has discovered that, if he arrives on our doorstep and the door is opened, he will make his way to the kitchen, park himself, in a sitting position beside the Fridge, and wait, patiently, to be fed pieces of cheese, which are taken in the air, with great skill.

Recently TBA and I were away for the day, and returned to find George's pet shoe, which he carries around, deposited in our porch.
YOU WERE OUT !!

We took the shoe back across the road, and were followed back home, with the usual pathetic, unfed, act, in front of the fridge.

Labradors are intelligent hounds------- and this one has trained us !!! :oops:
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Re: Are you a pet person?

Post by Katharine »

Neill, your George will never make a Search and Rescue dog! We had a talk about them one day and I can remember it being stressed that they could never be fed cheese as it makes it more difficult for them to follow scents. The speaker, and his dog, had been out on the mountains the previous night and found the ill prepared students they were seeking.
Katharine Dobson (Hills) 6.14, 1959 - 1965
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