What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

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Chris Blewett
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Chris Blewett » Fri Mar 18, 2011 7:23 pm

Now that sounds like the way to be remembered - I must remember to tell Mrs B to make sure that everyone gets smashed in a pub/hotel/garden somewhere!
After, that is, she has played our song - 'we have all the time in the world'
:drinkers:
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Angela Woodford » Fri Mar 18, 2011 8:34 pm

I want a sad and dignified religious funeral. Absolutely no horribly jolly vicar and laughter in church. As formal as possible, please, but no expensive coffin. I'll be surprised and delighted from where ever I am if anybody shows any grief. Everyone in deepest black - but white flowers. Lots of flowers! All women to wear hats.

Then - absolutely no "celebration of my life". If anyone describes me as "bubbly" I will come back and haunt them!

Disposal of the body... it all depends on the budget. Whip out any organ which might be useful! I'd like to be buried in a woodland place, but if I'm cremated, please scatter my ashes in the garden of my South London childhood home; the place where I was most happy.
"Baldrick, you wouldn't recognise a cunning plan if it painted itself purple, and danced naked on top of a harpsichord singing "Cunning plans are here again.""

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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Chris Blewett » Fri Mar 18, 2011 8:48 pm

Just seen this - now thats a way to go!!!

http://www.cambridge-news.co.uk/Home/Tr ... uneral.htm
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by midget » Fri Mar 18, 2011 9:04 pm

My sister-in-law wanted to go out to sherry and the sound of trumpets. The funeral Mass was quite conventional, but the commital at the crematorium was accompanied by "Fanfare for the Common Man". Her sister was so impressed that the same was played at her own funeral 3 years later.
For myself I'd quite like Frank Sinatra singing "You'll never walk alone" (no other version allowed)
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by englishangel » Fri Mar 18, 2011 9:45 pm

A woodland burial for me too after anything useful has been taken. I signed up as an organ donor at the earliest opportunity. Craig, medical research may save many lives and I won't need it so anyone can have anything.My husband, older son and daughter are of a similar mind,(for themselves as well) unfortunately I have no idea what my other son thinks as he tunes out whenever the matter is discussed.

There is a woodland burial place in Beaconsfield and there are plans for one in Chesham Bois for Spoonbill.

http://www.naturaldeath.org.uk/index.ph ... al-grounds.

The anniversary of my mother's death is next Wednesday (she died on Easter Sunday, a good day for a committed Christian), and it took us a year to scatter her ashes (Mother's Day the following year). We will scatter my father's in the same place when his time comes.
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by CHDad » Sat Mar 19, 2011 6:37 am

A friend of mine went to a funeral recently where the deceased had asked for "when smoke gets in your eyes" to be played as the coffin moved off at the crematorium! I also attended a funeral where they played "he aint heavy he's my brother" as they carried the coffin out, I still don't know whether that was a joke or an error!

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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Chris Blewett » Sat Mar 19, 2011 8:26 am

The one really inspiring thought that I have is that the 'funeral' industry has changed to accommodate the individual wishes of the deceased and the family. It wasn't all that long ago that there were only two choices - crematorium or church - and the choices of music etc were equally restricted. Now, crematoria have a wide range of recorded music and hymns (with or without choirs) and it is possible to book as many 'slots' as you want to make the occasion truly personal. The woodland burial sites are a very recent addition which appeal to a lot of people - everything has to be biodegradable (for those of you that don't know!).

Which leaves me with just one question - where do I want to end up???

:D
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by englishangel » Sat Mar 19, 2011 9:31 am

Incidentally a cardboard coffin cannot be cremated, something to do with the chemicals needed to make it firm enough to carry. Wicker, reed and bamboo are nice alternatives. This was Wendy Richard's funeral

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/573975-star ... ds-funeral

My mother had a similar coffin and as it was spring there were posies of primroses tucked in around the fastenings.
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Chrissie Boy » Sat Mar 19, 2011 9:46 am

I'm thinking maybe I'd ask to have The Smurf Song played at the crematorium when I die, just to see how far you can get away with taking the pi55.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4MHNkT7b1Y&NR=1

A few pole-dancers wouldn't go amiss either, though by 2040 such things will probably be seen as rather tame.

Everyone attending the crematorium would be obliged to dress as Smurfs, obviously.

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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Angela Woodford » Sat Mar 19, 2011 11:59 am

[quote="englishangel My mother had a similar coffin and as it was spring there were posies of primroses tucked in around the fastenings.[/quote]

That's really lovely, Mary! (chokes, lump in throat, how beautiful...)
"Baldrick, you wouldn't recognise a cunning plan if it painted itself purple, and danced naked on top of a harpsichord singing "Cunning plans are here again.""

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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Chris Blewett » Sat Mar 19, 2011 12:08 pm

englishangel wrote:Incidentally a cardboard coffin cannot be cremated, something to do with the chemicals needed to make it firm enough to carry. Wicker, reed and bamboo are nice alternatives. This was Wendy Richard's funeral

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/573975-star ... ds-funeral

My mother had a similar coffin and as it was spring there were posies of primroses tucked in around the fastenings.

now thats really nice (wipes tears away...sorry working out of my female side again!!)
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by Angela Woodford » Sat Mar 19, 2011 12:13 pm

My father was an organist, who worked at the Putney Vale Crematorium. It always upset me that grieving relatives, convinced that the body of their loved one, would think that as the body slid into those curtains would be cremated on the spot.... in fact they would join a queue to be cremated at some time in the future.

And maybe the expensive coffin would be removed for resale after dark.
"Baldrick, you wouldn't recognise a cunning plan if it painted itself purple, and danced naked on top of a harpsichord singing "Cunning plans are here again.""

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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by J.R. » Sat Mar 19, 2011 12:16 pm

Angela Woodford wrote:My father was an organist, who worked at the Putney Vale Crematorium. It always upset me that grieving relatives, convinced that the body of their loved one, would think that as the body slid into those curtains would be cremated on the spot.... in fact they would join a queue to be cremated at some time in the future.

And maybe the expensive coffin would be removed for resale after dark.

It takes some time to cremate a body. As I understand it, the lids are always removed, ostensibly to aid the cremation. There used to be rumours that the lids would be re-used, but not the actual coffin.

What a cheerful topic for a sunny Saturday morning !!!!
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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by NEILL THE NOTORIOUS » Sun Mar 20, 2011 5:14 pm

I believe that I have, already, said that I have arranged my funeral, in some detail.

Bright colours, stirring (Favourite) hymns, no "Service" at the dismal Crematorium. (The 23rd Plalm,sung to "Crimond !)
I look on it as being a "Disposal of packaging" event. It is not I who is there, but my "Remains".

I believe that funerals are (Obviously) for those who are left behind, but everyone may have a different view about what is to take place, and each should be respected.

On the Irish Radio, there are announcements, such as --- "Mrs ***** will be "At Home" on Tuesday 14th from 6pm"
I think this is a lovely way to announce the "Wake"

I also believe, that organising the event, prior to your death, reduces the stress, which your loved ones are having to undergo at a difficult time.

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Re: What Funerary Arrangements Would You Want?

Post by sejintenej » Sun Mar 20, 2011 7:21 pm

NEILL THE NOTORIOUS wrote: On the Irish Radio, there are announcements, such as --- "Mrs ***** will be "At Home" on Tuesday 14th from 6pm"
I think this is a lovely way to announce the "Wake"
.
That, and the slightly posher "Mrs **** will receive visitors on Tuesday 14th from ... to....." were pretty standard in England - not just in respect of wakes / funerals but also normal visits.
Ireland has simply carried the custom forward. In respect of my cousin's death there was also a subsequent advertisement thanking those who supported the family
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