any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

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bosty94
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any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by bosty94 » Wed Apr 28, 2010 1:22 pm

I recently called the CH office to try to find out whether we had any chance left, as the date had just passed when parents become liable for the first term's fees. We had both been waiting as patiently as we could for this day, when I told my daughter we should know more. It seems everyone had paid and so there are unlikely to be any more children dropping out. It wasn't easy for me to ask questions, they weren't encouraged let's say, and I am wondering if anyone else can give me any more information with regards to kids on the waiting list at this stage. What is the school's policy..will they remain on this list in case kids drop out? Also would anyone please tell me whether there were any kids who dropped out in the first year(second form?) last year and any of the years previously. Have also heard of kids ocassionally not turning up at the start of term, but I imagine this is very rare? I just want to gauge the level of hope we still have. I do feel that the school could give the waiting list kids a few minutes of their time to ask questions when they have worked so hard and waited so long for such bad news. After all, the school still chose them to an extent( plus not exactly over yet) and it is a very tough blow for a child who really wants it.

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Jade
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by Jade » Wed Apr 28, 2010 1:33 pm

Hi,

I suggest you ring Mrs. Brakes in the school office, she's awfully nice. I'm sure she would be more than happy to answer your questions. My DS is in the second form, he told me a few kids have dropped out or are going to.

Good luck,
Jade

YadaYada
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by YadaYada » Wed Apr 28, 2010 5:11 pm

I have heard of 1 student in the second form who left during the first week. Obviously no guarantee that it will happen again, but it does happen.
Good Luck

And I'll second what people have said about Mrs Brakes.....she couldn't be friendlier or more helpful and approachable.

barwen
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by barwen » Wed Apr 28, 2010 11:37 pm

I truly sympathise with any child and parent of a child who is 'on the waiting list'.
We have been told that should a place become vacant for our son to enter year nine then we will be contacted. It is truly an awful position to be in but our position was of our own making having turned down a place for our son at year seven. So we have just got to accept things as they are but still have fingers crossed!
Just lately we have learnt through the forum that money has become an issue with C.H. Well, although we would not be in a position to pay full fees we would be able to contribute a fair amount as over the last nine years we have never defaulted on settling school fees and neither would we if our son is accepted. After all some money is better than an empty place if C.H is unable to fill the spaces by full fee paying parents.

Anyway good luck and I agree that contacting Mrs Brakes would be a good move. She is a wonderful lady, both knowledgeable and helpful.
Last edited by barwen on Thu May 06, 2010 10:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

ailurophile
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by ailurophile » Thu Apr 29, 2010 5:27 pm

Bosty94, I have a lot of sympathy for your situation; we didn’t suffer the anxiety of being placed on the waiting list for CH, but like you we applied to the school because the only local state alternative (a single sex comp which at the time had been placed in special measures) seemed far from ideal for our sensitive and academically bright son. I know how very disappointed we would have been if he hadn’t got into CH; but the school is hugely oversubscribed, and it’s a sad fact that for every child who is successful in being offered a place there are going to be several who aren’t so lucky.

However, while I’m sure you don’t mean to be insensitive I must say that I have been rather upset by the tone of your recent posts. As I’ve said elsewhere on the forum, my family is now in a situation where the increasing fees have forced us to withdraw our son at the end of his current GE year (year 11) and he will be moving back into the state system for his sixth form. This has been a very distressing decision for us, but your posts have made me aware that there might be families on the sixth-form waiting list ‘hoping and praying’ for my son’s place to become available. Please don’t forget that for every child who doesn’t take up an offered place at CH there will be a reason, and it’s unlikely to be a happy one.

I do understand how stressful it must be for you to know that your daughter is so tantalisingly close to getting into CH (and maybe it would be kinder of the school not to let families know they're on a waiting list unless a place does become available); but just think how much more heartbreaking it would be if she’d actually been offered that desperately wanted place, and you had to turn it down.

bosty94
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by bosty94 » Thu Apr 29, 2010 7:35 pm

ailurophile, I sympathise with your situation as well. However, each of our situations is different and I wouldn't want to criticise anyone for what I might perceive as their view that their situation is worse than ours. I certainly didn't mean to say that yours was, of course, and I am aware there are always people worse off than us. And I think that is true for most people. I am sorry if my 'tone' - which perhaps was imagined as this is a difficult thing to translate in text- offended you. But I really didn't mean for you to relate it to your situation and assume that I thought we were worse off. I think the point I was trying to get across was not that I couldn't accept that we didn't have a place..I fully respect the school's decision...but that I was finding it hard to find out the answers to some questions that would help us to judge what level of chance we still have. This is not only so that I can try to help my child to get in to the most realistic right mind-set, but also for practical reasons. eg we may want to consider moving to another area once we feel the chances are below a certain probablity, so she may go to a different school. I think the point is that it is still not a no, so this is not about us not getting in. it's about getting info. I may have you confused with someone else, but if I am not mistaken you have had to some extent problems with this yourself. What is it they say? 'Focus not on each other's differences but see your simalarities.?' I do think it odd to point the finger and say 'imagine if you were in our situation..much worse!' when you really don't know our family circumstances or how important this might be for us. My child's father has very serious and multiple addicition problems (in and out of rehab) and has recently relapsed. So yes I might feel any number of things if I were in your situation, but that doesn't make my feelings any less valid. Another lady kindly sent me an e-mail giving me a little more of an idea on the info I was looking for, and she said she didn't post it on the forrum because there were some 'rather critical posters'! What a shame! We should all support each other I say!

barwen
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by barwen » Fri Apr 30, 2010 12:11 am

bosty94 I certainly sympathise with your situation. It certainly puts my situation into perspective. 'Well said bosty'

ailurophile
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by ailurophile » Fri Apr 30, 2010 5:10 pm

Bosty94, I really had no intention of inferring that your own personal circumstances are any less or more deserving than mine or anyone else’s. Such issues are rightly the business of the admissions panel, and I deeply regret that as a sad consequence of the current financial circumstances the school can no longer afford to help more families like yours, and must give places to an increasing percentage of full fee payers.

I do take your point about the difference between your wanting to get information rather than get in. CH are indeed rather poor at communication, and you have my sympathy there. However, when you said on another thread "Today is the day that new parents have to pay their deposits for CH, so we are hoping and praying that more places will become available this week and perhaps we will be lucky enough to get a phone call" I’m afraid this did rather suggest that you were hoping other families would have to drop out! Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick. Your feelings are of course perfectly valid, and yes we should all support each other - but to me, that also means that I sparing a thought for all the children who did get into CH this year, and I hope that each one will be able to take up their place and be happy and successful at the school. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you at the same time though!

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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by dinahcat » Fri Apr 30, 2010 9:35 pm

ailurophile I know you have had issues with communication regarding fees but this is a can of worms which is separate from other forms of communication with the school as ,with fees, you are communicating only with the Foundation not the School. It may be true that the Foundation haven't met up to your expectations regarding communication but your comments might lead parents to believe that the School doesn't communicate very well regarding pupli welfare which is an entirely different thing and not my experience. All emails I have sent regarding my children have been answered promptly and efficiently and with a great deal of care. Staff work tirelessly and above and beyond the call of duty with regard to pupil welfare . They have a hundred million subtle and sensitive contacts with our children every day. When we are away from our children we worry and fret and miss them and wish were dealing with what goes on but the staff know this .

bosty94
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by bosty94 » Sat May 01, 2010 9:44 am

ailurophile, thank you for your comments and for clarifying what you found insensitive. I realise that the reasons behind withdrawing children from CH are likely to be unhappy ones. But the children not accepting a place to go into the second form....I do not agree that the reasons behind that decision is likely to be an unhappy one. (althought their could be exceptions) Out of the 112 children offered a place, there will be at the very least a handful of children who have been offered scholarships or bursaries at other schools. And I believe that the majority of children who turn down their places at CH do so because they have been offered places at other good schools - bursaries/scholarships or good state/grammar schools- and have simply made that choice, possibly because they would prefer to live at home.

ailurophile
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Re: any hope left for kids on waiting list at this stage?

Post by ailurophile » Sat May 01, 2010 12:58 pm

Dinahcat wrote
ailurophile I know you have had issues with communication regarding fees but this is a can of worms which is separate from other forms of communication with the school as ,with fees, you are communicating only with the Foundation not the School. It may be true that the Foundation haven't met up to your expectations regarding communication but your comments might lead parents to believe that the School doesn't communicate very well regarding pupli welfare which is an entirely different thing and not my experience. All emails I have sent regarding my children have been answered promptly and efficiently and with a great deal of care. Staff work tirelessly and above and beyond the call of duty with regard to pupil welfare . They have a hundred million subtle and sensitive contacts with our children every day. When we are away from our children we worry and fret and miss them and wish were dealing with what goes on but the staff know this .
You're right of course Dinahcat. To set the record straight it is indeed the Foundation with whom we have found communication difficult and frustrating. With regards to our childrens' welfare at the school I could not praise the housemaster and his team more highly, they have been unfailingly helpful and supportive over the years and I couldn't think of people in whose care I would be happier to place my boys.

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