Unofficial Christ's Hospital Forum

cupcakemom wrote:May I suggest "lanyard"?!

Thank you!

DD wears hers on a friendship bracelet that the 2nd formers and their nursemaids made in house on their first day

Now that the second formers have phones, can I just ask how often you contact your child? I don't want to contact him embarassingly often, but at the same time I'd hate for him to feel abandoned!

This is us.....will be different for everyone else.

DS texts me when he gets up to say good morning. I text back.

6pm ish he texts and we talk on the house phone.

Lights out....he texts night night and I respond.

I tend to let him make the contact first in case he is too busy. He's now in his 3rd year and this is still our pattern. I'd say let them dictate it and try to avoid texting them too much.

Hope that helps.

ok. I shall wait for him to call me (I could be waiting some weeks!), i've text him once today (or is that texted?). I think at the moment he is including himself in all activities and so has no or very little free time. Maybe when his friends start ringing their parents he'll think to do it too!

He text me today to tell me he'd had a great day

For me - it's a case of no contact means all's well! Had a panic text this afternoon "Mummy, someone's stolen my boots." It transpired she'd left them in the day room!! Maybe set up a routine ... You have text communication after breakfast and after prep ... Just to let you know everything's ok?

I spoke to him after prep. I think I'll text him then just to check that everything is ok.

Was funny listening to him talk to his 8 yr old brother, neither are particularly communicative on the phone!

There's no formula to this as what ever way you look at it you are used to seeing your child every day and talking over the bones of it. My eldest who left this year phoned every day for an hour at least.Sometimes I left the phone and came back and she was still talking...House Parents and some other staff thought this was odd and I suspect thought she was moaning and home sick and all sorts.She wasn't but she just enjoyed talking to me -that i
s in fact the odd bit . Teenager talking to parent-surely not? Second one hates talking on the phone and I hate texting so impasse there.He says he sees me every three weeks and so there would be nothing to say if he said it on the phone.That's definitely a boy thing whatever anyone says .Third one is too busy .We have had 'a conversation' this weekend about how this isn't a reason for not talking to anyone at all -even a parent!
It is ,however, amazing the effect a handwritten postcard or letter can have. A cheapo book from amazon or a magazine just says you are thinking of them in the same way it would if they were at home.The cheesy 'I saw this and thought of you ' thing.It is a very unnatural thing to send your child away from you albeit for the right reasons and both parties will struggle with this . I agree with yadayada that if you can establish a routine it just becomes a natural part of the day and you will remain connected .

I second Dinahcat's suggestion about sending things in the post. I send a postcard every week - it's quite fun collecting them throughout the year to send them off and he puts them on his noticeboard.

I also asked his grandpa to do a magazine subscription for his Christmas present last year and I know he enjoys it when it turns up at school.

'Fraid I do disagree about the 'boy' thing - I think it's just an individual thing. I get about half an hours worth of chat about the days events on the phone each day. I think the Housemaster thought this was unnecessary and 'wrong' during the first year and I suspect he got a bit teased about it but it's never stopped him and now it is simply routine.

my 2 girls, even though they lived at home, still loved loved it when grandparents sent things to House - especially food parcels!

we are working on ds2's literacy, so he sent a 'Wheres Wally' postcard every couple of days during the first few weeks, with a couple of sentences about the computer games they enjoy playing together and i also popped a postcard in. So i shall continue to do this a couple of times a week, and supplement this with quick phone calls - he's like his father, only thinks it's necessary to use the phone if you actually want something!

Thanks for the replies, it's put my mind at ease.

My ds texts every morning to say goodmorning, glad he did today as we would have overslept! He also sends a goodnight one and the odd text during the day. He did say he d phone, but I told him not to as he is still struggling a bit with homesickness and I think it may make it worse if he hears our voices. Writing is great, I write diary style letters twice a week and his 2 young siblings make pictures. Our family and friends also send the occasional postcard, DS said it really helped him those first weeks. And yes Amazon is just brilliant! We are lucky to get letters back from him , and keep every single one of them ofcourse.

Mrs C. wrote:my 2 girls, even though they lived at home, still loved loved it when grandparents sent things to House - especially food parcels!

.... and I thought the school food had improved by then !

Did the Red Cross get involved as well ?