call for limericks

huntertitus · Post by **huntertitus** » Tue Sep 26, 2006 9:36 pm

I was not deliberately crude
I do not enjoy being rude
The choc hen in question
Was just a suggestion
I'm not very fond of being sued

What animal you think it's like
A very fat rat or a Shrike
It couldn't be goose,
A skunk or a moose
I think I'll just get on my bike

Rory · Post by **Rory** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 7:36 am

Your writing is surely a habit
But Iâ€™m sure that thing is a rabbit
It just wants to be kissed
And she couldnâ€™t resist
So thatâ€™s what made Ruthie just grab it.

Ruthie-Baby(old a/c) · Thu Sep 28, 2006 10:18 am

I didn't see where it was heading
When I met up with Plum since his wedding
A St Matthew's Day drink
At Bank station I think
Never thought I'd wake up in Reading

Sorry, just couldn't come up with anything on the rabbit front, but Rory's right. Wel right about it being a rabbit anyway!

huntertitus · Post by **huntertitus** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 1:05 pm

In blue you look like a nurse
The rabbit was ill, feeling worse
So that poor sickly bunny
Whose nose was so runny
Got brandy and honey
To make it feel sunny
I'm not being funny
But this at least isn't rude verse

UserRequestedRemoval · Thu Sep 28, 2006 3:15 pm

I wish I could do limericks, I would do one for Robins buttons

huntertitus · Post by **huntertitus** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 3:31 pm

what buttons?

UserRequestedRemoval · Thu Sep 28, 2006 3:33 pm

Passing the 1000 mark for posts

Mid A 15 · Post by **Mid A 15** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 3:36 pm

It is a disappointment to me

That soc and Hunter T

Have committed the ultimate crime

Of not communicating in rhyme

an atoning poem I wait to see!

huntertitus · Post by **huntertitus** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 3:41 pm

It seems Sean's got more than one button
He looks like a lamb dressed as mutton
So I am now toasting
His thousandfold posting
For he is a posting-mad glutton!

DavebytheSea · Post by **DavebytheSea** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 3:48 pm

soc wrote:Passing the 1000 mark for posts

All postings on this thread must have verse - blank or otherwise. Hitherto, every breach of the rule, (including my own), has been punished by a same day apology in verse - check back if you wish!!

So now we expect to hear from you

It won't do, Soc
You've made a mock-
ery of this.
And Robin's is
To know by now
That this is how
This thread must be.

So Hunterti
And Sean you must
Shake off the dust
Get out the tools,
Obey the Rules,
And write in verse
Or Helen's curse
Will strike you dead
(Or so 'tis said).

So now in rhyme
Get up arise
Without more time
Apologise.

huntertitus · Post by **huntertitus** » Thu Sep 28, 2006 4:33 pm

The reason that my post was not
Inside a rhyme was I'd forgot
To look up at the subject, NAY!
I'd answered Sean's and have to pay!

That takes the biscuit, takes the cake!
My reputation is at stake
I'm not, I hope, a poisonous snake

My deep apology please do take
I'll not commit the same mistake
The same mistake I shall not make

And never shall the p*ss I take
Or old tradition try to break
(Or tread on any garden rake)

Or go jump into Doctor's lake
(Where fish do swim I'm told the hake
It swims among the ducks and drake
who dips his head his thirst to slake)

I do not want my words opaque
I do not want to sound a fake
But now, forsooth, my point I'll make

I will not shiver, will not shake
I will not quiver, will not quake
(I hope my readers are still awake)

A thousand posts that I have spake
What celebration, not a cake?
Not even loaves of bread to bake?
No chips and not a sirloin steak?

Forgive me now for heaven's sake!

UserRequestedRemoval · Thu Sep 28, 2006 4:48 pm

Oh deary me
I feel so sad
I must now plea
the lack of knowledge that I had

Verse is, when penned by me
a form that is perverse

I strive and strive
to write some verse
that all declare to be good rhyme
but as you see
a verse from me, it is but pee!

soso · Post by **soso** » Wed Oct 25, 2006 11:41 am

oh Dave by the sea!
what a great treat
was our sail round the bay
and i'm writing to say
a belated thankyou
from us Blues-old and new
for the lunch and the yachting
and the dolphins we spotted!

DavebytheSea · Post by **DavebytheSea** » Wed Oct 25, 2006 12:02 pm

soso wrote:oh Dave by the sea!
what a great treat
was our sail round the bay
and i'm writing to say
a belated thankyou
from us Blues-old and new
for the lunch and the yachting
and the dolphins we spotted!

Soso so kind
To thank me in rhyme.
The pleasure all mine
In the sun and the wind,
Thrice blest was I then
On my little boat,
Three ladies afloat
Such beauty to ken.

DavebytheSea · Post by **DavebytheSea** » Sat Dec 23, 2006 4:00 pm

Wishing you all a very Happy Christmas - two little verses ....

A Christmas Carol

Carols by candlelight,
The warm incense of the hearth,
Chestnuts popping,
Gift-wrapped parcels hug the gilded tree.

A small child,
Alone with his mother,
In a far-off land.
Destitute.

This child is our joy and our salvation.

The Day before Christmas

Sitting in Asda,
A coffee in my hand,
Carols and tinsel,
Families shopping, shopping,
Christmas shopping,
The turkeys, crackers and mince pies
All reduced to clear.
Asda Greeters at the door,
"A Merry Christmas to you, sir,
Whole salmon, only ten pounds,
Suitable for freezing."

We bought a camera, digitalised,
And left the brussells sprouts behind.

David Eastburn - Christmas, 2007