Unofficial Christ's Hospital Forum

With regards to having sex at school, I'm sure it has always been against school rules, under the headmaster before Dr Southern it was immediate expulsion, then Southern slackened it off a bit and now it appears that Franklyn has tightened it up again, so nothing too much has changed on that front. I remember two people being expelled when I was there, (it would have been about 95 or 96) and they got caught on a leave weekend, but still expelled because they were on school grounds. I have to say I agree with the parents on this, rules are rules, I am old enough to make my own decisions on this, and I currently live with my partner, however if we go and visit my mother, we are put in separate rooms because she disagrees with it (until marriage) but that's fine, her house, her rules and I don't see why it should be any different at school. It will always go on and as long as provisions are made for those prepared to take the risk of being caught I don't see a problem with the rule. What I mean by provisions is, when I was there you could go down the sicker and get condoms off the nurses, and of course it was confidential.

Someone mentioned two pupils getting into trouble for being in the same room with pyjamas on, this seems a little excessive, presumably they wouldn't have got in trouble had they been of the same sex.... which raises the question, where does the school stand on that, and has anyone ever been caught in a 'same-sex compromising position?'

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NEILL THE NOTORIOUS wrote: When eventually caught, he was expelled------ do we now think this was unreasonable ? ?

02juddra wrote:Personally, the expulsion for the pupil who stole weaponry and took aim a fellow pupils is in no way excessive frankly i'm amazed that the school didn't call the police.

I think Neill was saying that it was the Junior who was expelled (presumably for running away for 3 days).

qwerty wrote: however if we go and visit my mother, we are put in separate rooms because she disagrees with it (until marriage) but that's fine, her house, her rules

At the risk of taking this right off topic. But a point worth debate.

What happens if you settle down with your partner, bring up a family and live in a long term relationship, should you be allowed to share a room?
I think life and personal relationships are too difficult to have hard and fast rules about (Your point about same sex relationships at school illustrates this very neatly).

Oh, Lonelymom --- yes very good !
Actually, I think it was reported to the Police, who carried out the search, with possibly the Army ----- Again, Not for the Junior ! !

Actually, Neill, I'm amazed that anyone was allowed to 'borrow' a rifle and grenades!!! What did they think he was going to be doing with them?

You are all talking off the point.
Why do you not take notice of my post on pg. 11

Stop with the sex business. It's over now.

We've been told off!

I'm going to leave this thread, since my daughter is extremely happy at CH under Mr Franklin's rules

Spartacist wrote:It's over now.

Having been reading this thread with the greatest of interest, I have been very reluctant to contribute my miserable middle aged opinion - fearing that I'd seem way out of date with my lack of knowledge of modern CH.

Or possibly my ignorance of modern attitudes towards sex...

But it's those words of yours, Spartacist, that speak to me! "It's over now".

This is, of course, a personal opinion, which you may dismiss as nonsense. But I believe that sexual relationships can bring a load of complications into one's life. It's not all urgency and bliss. There are the agonies of passion, possessiveness, jealousy, secrecy, fear of inadequacy, vulnerability. The hideous grief when one knows it's over now.

The thing about living in a community is that it's hard to achieve the privacy that's possible in the outside world. People observe, gossip, critiscise. Inevitably, raised emotional temperature knocks on to others in the community. Ask anyone who's participated in the Office Romance; when It's Over Now gets debated at the water cooler.

That's why I feel a bit dubious at the thought of sexual relationships being an accepted part of CH leisure activities. You guys seem to have so much interest and variety packed into your days, as well as academic expectations which seem awesomely aspirational. To participate responsibly in the regular satisfaction of mutual erotic partnership whilst you are still at school - no, I just don't see it somehow.

I could go on, but I dare say you've had enough of me...

Angela Woodford wrote:

Spartacist wrote:It's over now.

Having been reading this thread with the greatest of interest, I have been very reluctant to contribute my miserable middle aged opinion - fearing that I'd seem way out of date with my lack of knowledge of modern CH.

Or possibly my ignorance of modern attitudes towards sex...

But it's those words of yours, Spartacist, that speak to me! "It's over now".

This is, of course, a personal opinion, which you may dismiss as nonsense. But I believe that sexual relationships can bring a load of complications into one's life. It's not all urgency and bliss. There are the agonies of passion, possessiveness, jealousy, secrecy, fear of inadequacy, vulnerability. The hideous grief when one knows it's over now.

The thing about living in a community is that it's hard to achieve the privacy that's possible in the outside world. People observe, gossip, critiscise. Inevitably, raised emotional temperature knocks on to others in the community. Ask anyone who's participated in the Office Romance; when It's Over Now gets debated at the water cooler.

That's why I feel a bit dubious at the thought of sexual relationships being an accepted part of CH leisure activities. You guys seem to have so much interest and variety packed into your days, as well as academic expectations which seem awesomely aspirational. To participate responsibly in the regular satisfaction of mutual erotic partnership whilst you are still at school - no, I just don't see it somehow.

I could go on, but I dare say you've had enough of me...

No - my point is that the original topic was blown out of proportion by some Blues and Old Blues... In truth.... Yes, I am glad you have enjoyed this debate - but it is not about sex anymore. It never was in the first place - it just came up in conversation. Yes, I do feel your points are .... conservative... to say the least? But what would a young man expect?

Thanks for your contribution, but please. PLEASE can everyone move on.... it is NOT about sex.

LONELY MUM.... how many years have your Child(ren) been at CH? 1 year? 2 years?

Yes, but I honestly don't see what difference that makes. True, she has only ever experienced CH under Mr Franklin's rules, but that doesn't mean that she's worse off than someone who was a pupil under Dr Southern, because the point is that she doesn't know any different. She is happy as things are, as, I suspect, are many other Second Form, Third Form, LE pupils etc. It is the older pupils, the Grecians and Deps etc, who will probably feel more aggrieved by the changes, but since the Grecians will be leaving CH in approximately 2 months I doubt whether any outcomes from the petition you are drawing up would be in time to affect them anyway. And when my daughter gets to her Deps and Grecians years, well, what she's never had she won't miss. So I'm a fairly new parent and I'm not an OB so I don't really feel qualified to comment on whether CH is better or worse under the new regime, so there's not a lot of point in me staying on this thread, is there?

lonelymom wrote:Yes, but I honestly don't see what difference that makes. True, she has only ever experienced CH under Mr Franklin's rules, but that doesn't mean that she's worse off than someone who was a pupil under Dr Southern, because the point is that she doesn't know any different. She is happy as things are, as, I suspect, are many other Second Form, Third Form, LE pupils etc. It is the older pupils, the Grecians and Deps etc, who will probably feel more aggrieved by the changes,

I agree lonelymom, regardless of who is head at the time, many UF,GE,DEPS and Grecs will get restless and fustrated by the rules of the school-tightening of rules becasue naturally they are at an age when they want to gain more independence and figure things out themsevles and unfortunatly at a boarding school they are more restricted in what they can do than a day school because they are not going home everynight where they could potentially get up to whatever they like.

As for Spartacist, no your thread was never directly about sex and it has moved more onto that, but surely you have noticed from other threads, where we pick up on a thouht, statement we often move the thread onto that and have many debates/conversations about that point. Its generates a good chat between us all which is really what is needed for the forum to continue!

And I think I'm right in saying that it was either a current pupil or a YOB who mentioned sex in the first place, but once the thread moved onto that topic it actually proved something, which is that each of us see things from different perspectives. The no-sex rule will be viewed differently by current pupils, YOBs, parents, OBs and staff. Nobody's opinion is wrong, it is just different from someone else's. And all of the changes that are being made at CH will be viewed the same, from different perspectives. Some will agree with the changes, some will disagree. If your petition succeeds and the changes are reverted, it will, no doubt, please some and displease others. Mr Franklin and SMT will never manage to keep everybody happy, so there's no point in them trying - they will just do what they think is right, which is, after all, what they are being paid to do.

Here Here Lonleymom!!!!