Diversion! (Health Warning! Full of smutty inuendo etc.)

Rory · Post by **Rory** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 11:48 am

OK - sorry - work intervened...

A dolphin tried to sing happy birthday to me but he got my name wrong...

and

a floating log is when the female lies in the water motionless and the male rakes her with his teeth.... it all sounds like fun with all that foreplay but apparently the actual intercourse only takes a matter of seconds.

Ruthie-Baby(old a/c) · Wed Sep 27, 2006 11:52 am

Rory wrote:A dolphin tried to sing happy birthday to me but he got my name wrong...

And who exactly do you blame for this? The dolphin?

Rory · Post by **Rory** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 11:57 am

Who else????? If they are as intelligent as everyone says they are...

Richard Ruck · Post by **Richard Ruck** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 11:58 am

Rory wrote: a floating log is when the female lies in the water motionless and the male rakes her with his teeth.... it all sounds like fun with all that foreplay but apparently the actual intercourse only takes a matter of seconds.

I wonder if the Scotsman in the harbour had to do that........

DavebytheSea · Post by **DavebytheSea** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:01 pm

Richard Ruck wrote:
Rory wrote: a floating log is when the female lies in the water motionless and the male rakes her with his teeth.... it all sounds like fun with all that foreplay but apparently the actual intercourse only takes a matter of seconds.
I wonder if the Scotsman in the harbour had to do that........

the kilt would intervene - that is unless he had been writing limericks at home.

DavebytheSea · Post by **DavebytheSea** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:02 pm

and the dolphin would sneeze when he reached the sporran

Mid A 15 · Post by **Mid A 15** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:03 pm

Rory wrote: it all sounds like fun with all that foreplay but apparently the actual intercourse only takes a matter of seconds.

Bit like humans then

am I on the smut thread

Ruthie-Baby(old a/c) · Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:04 pm

DavebytheSea wrote:and the dolphin would sneeze when he reached the sporran

why?

and what was the scotsman doing in the harbour in the first place?

writing limericks???

Richard Ruck · Post by **Richard Ruck** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:04 pm

DavebytheSea wrote:
Richard Ruck wrote:
Rory wrote: a floating log is when the female lies in the water motionless and the male rakes her with his teeth.... it all sounds like fun with all that foreplay but apparently the actual intercourse only takes a matter of seconds.
I wonder if the Scotsman in the harbour had to do that........
the kilt would intervene - that is unless he had been writing limericks at home.

I would imagine that the dress-code for such an occasion would be 'limerick-friendly'!

Ruthie-Baby(old a/c) · Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:05 pm

yeah but my point is what such an occasion???

Richard Ruck · Post by **Richard Ruck** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:08 pm

Ruthie-Baby wrote:yeah but my point is what such an occasion???

An illicit liaison between a Scotsman and a harbour porpoise.

Ruthie-Baby(old a/c) · Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:11 pm

Richard Ruck wrote:
Ruthie-Baby wrote:yeah but my point is what such an occasion???
An illicit liaison between a Scotsman and a harbour porpoise.

obviously.

we didn't know (or maybe I just didn't read the detail) that he was Scottish. That explains it.

Richard Ruck · Post by **Richard Ruck** » Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:17 pm

Ruthie-Baby wrote:
Richard Ruck wrote:
Ruthie-Baby wrote:yeah but my point is what such an occasion???
An illicit liaison between a Scotsman and a harbour porpoise.
obviously.

we didn't know (or maybe I just didn't read the detail) that he was Scottish. That explains it.

A good point! Just becuse the incident happened in a Scottish fishing port I should not have just assumed that the perpetrator was in fact a Scotsman. It's just too easy to stereotype, isn't it?

The bloke could just as easily have been an American tourist who slipped into the water and wanted to 'thank' the beastie for rescuing him.

Ruthie-Baby(old a/c) · Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:17 pm

Richard Ruck wrote:
Ruthie-Baby wrote:
Richard Ruck wrote: An illicit liaison between a Scotsman and a harbour porpoise.
obviously.

we didn't know (or maybe I just didn't read the detail) that he was Scottish. That explains it.
A good point! Just becuse the incident happened in a Scottish fishing port I should not have just assumed that the perpetrator was in fact a Scotsman. It's just too easy to sterotype, isn't it?

The bloke could just as easily have been an American tourist who slipped into the water and wanted to 'thank' the beastie for rescuing him.

Ha! Much more likely methinks

UserRequestedRemoval · Wed Sep 27, 2006 12:22 pm

How did the guy get caught?