Corporate corner (incorporating management bollox-speak)

Anything that doesn't fit anywhere else, and is NON CH related - chat about the weather, or anything else that takes your fancy.

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AKAP
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Post by AKAP » Wed Mar 22, 2006 1:05 pm

An organisation that responds to crticism will be stronger not weaker.

( 12 words no bolloxspeak, that anyone can understand. BUT promotion prospects will go up the spout).

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hoob
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Post by hoob » Wed Mar 22, 2006 3:09 pm

alternatively "who cares if you don't like it - its going to happen"

Team synergy sessions are the key to effective and productive mutual support mechanisms

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FrogBoxed
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Post by FrogBoxed » Wed Mar 22, 2006 6:30 pm

I hate being "tasked" with a job. Yuck, yuck, yuck.
Louise Barr Col B 89–96 | Frog Box Design

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FrogBoxed
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Post by FrogBoxed » Wed Mar 22, 2006 6:32 pm

And I hate anyone who picks low-hanging fruit.

Since when did business take place on a fruit farm?!
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FrogBoxed
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Post by FrogBoxed » Wed Mar 22, 2006 6:33 pm

And synergies... don't get me started on synergies...
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FrogBoxed
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Post by FrogBoxed » Wed Mar 22, 2006 6:34 pm

And no one, but no one will get any ticks in boxes for getting their ducks in a row.

Since when did business take place in the bath?!
Louise Barr Col B 89–96 | Frog Box Design

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Richard Ruck
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Post by Richard Ruck » Wed Mar 22, 2006 7:02 pm

FrogBoxed wrote:I hate being "tasked" with a job. Yuck, yuck, yuck.
Oh yes, another pet hate - I think this use of nouns as verbs is a primarily American habit, isn't it?

If anyone has any examples please feel free to name and shame.

That reminds me of another 'think-tank' word. Has anyone else seen notices on a buses which let you know the number of passengers the vehicle can carry?

Something along the lines of ' 45 seated, 28 standees'.

Now, what in the name of John Prescott is a 'standee'?
Ba.A / Mid. B 1972 - 1978

Thee's got'n where thee cassn't back'n, hassn't?

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hoob
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Post by hoob » Wed Mar 22, 2006 7:48 pm

and where exactly did "outwith" come from?

I hate that word.....
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Why is there so much month left at the end of my money?

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Richard Ruck
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Post by Richard Ruck » Wed Mar 22, 2006 8:02 pm

hoob wrote:and where exactly did "outwith" come from?

I hate that word.....
It's Scottish.

I have friends in Sussex who say "somewhen".

Quite sensible, really......
Ba.A / Mid. B 1972 - 1978

Thee's got'n where thee cassn't back'n, hassn't?

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Mrs C.
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Post by Mrs C. » Wed Mar 22, 2006 8:03 pm

Can we include "teenspeak" here?
My pet hate - "like".
I`ve been asked several times this afternoon "can I have like a bag?"
We dont have "like" bags, they really are real bags!!!!
The best way to forget your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

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jtaylor
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Post by jtaylor » Wed Mar 22, 2006 9:02 pm

"D'ya get me" and "You know what I mean" (Lenny Henry used to do that one justice"

"Init" - hate it.

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sejintenej
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Post by sejintenej » Wed Mar 22, 2006 9:37 pm

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Office of the Executive Vice President
for Administrative & Fiscal Services
900 qqqqqqqqq Drive, Suite 330
Rzzzzzzzze, Mx 123456
4441-123456
xxxxxxxxxxxxx@yyyyyyyyyyyycollege.edu

For heavens sake, I've stayed with this person, my wife was at school with her ...................... I KNOW where she works (and has worked for the past umpteen years). I'm not so thick that I have to be reminded - and it is a personal email anyway. Can't the st*p*d c*w think?
I called the police about a murder on the lawn
but they said they couldn't do anything about crows so stop calling

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marty
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Post by marty » Wed Mar 22, 2006 10:57 pm

What people think they're saying

1. "I'm just going to the ATM machine"
2. "Please enter your PIN number"

What they're actually saying

1."I'm just going to the Automatic Teller Machine Machine"
2. "Please enter you Personal Identification Number Number"


Another query - why do ambulances have the word "ambulance" written backwards on the front of them? Don't answer - I'm being rhetorical. I know the quick answer is so that you can read it in the rear view mirror. What I want to know is who wouldn't realise that the large white van with flashing blue lights and screaming siren behind them is an ambulance?

And why when I went to Washington DC did I see cars driving around with 'Secret Police' written on the side? Duh!!!
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.

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jtaylor
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Post by jtaylor » Wed Mar 22, 2006 11:06 pm

marty wrote:What people think they're saying
1. "I'm just going to the ATM machine"
2. "Please enter your PIN number"
3. The HIV Virus....

J
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englishangel
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Post by englishangel » Thu Mar 23, 2006 8:21 am

sejintenej wrote:xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Office of the Executive Vice President
for Administrative & Fiscal Services
900 qqqqqqqqq Drive, Suite 330
Rzzzzzzzze, Mx 123456
4441-123456
xxxxxxxxxxxxx@yyyyyyyyyyyycollege.edu

For heavens sake, I've stayed with this person, my wife was at school with her ...................... I KNOW where she works (and has worked for the past umpteen years). I'm not so thick that I have to be reminded - and it is a personal email anyway. Can't the st*p*d c*w think?
It is called a signature and it's attached to all emails.

I thiink you all know I was at Hertford 65-72 but there it is every time I post.
"If a man speaks, and there isn't a woman to hear him, is he still wrong?"

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