call for limericks

[DavebytheSea]

Dear Helen,
Please tick off J.R.
He's broken the rule rule that is hyah (here?)
To express all in verse
(Whether good, bad, or worse,)
To write simply in prose is not fay-ah (fair).

[helen]

Dear Helen,
Please tick off J.R.
He's broken the rule rule that is hyah (here?)
To express all in verse
(Whether good, bad, or worse,)
To write simply in prose is not fair.

I'm not even sure what he meant
As he wrote those few lines giving vent
To a nostalgic call
For the Goon above all
So I wish he'd explain his intent (in verse of course)

And yes Dave of course you are right
That prose on this thread's not a sight
We want to let pass
Very often, - too crass
When no verse is there too to recite . ....or delight

(couldn't decide which was best!)-

[helen]

The scandals alumni now tell
That went on among school personnel
Should go in a book
So we'd all get a look
And I bet you could sell it as well.

[helen]

The topic re where to hide booze
tells so many places to choose
but we had no sweat
because we'd never get
Any liquor at all, we OLD Blues.

And what's happened to the other versifiers out there??

[helen]

This looks like it's going to be
The last verse you'll hear now from me
Some threads do give out
Although without a doubt
This was viewed by a lot, you'll agree!

[DavebytheSea]

When expressing your views on here, Simon,
In couplets you should try to enshrine 'em.
For, if not in verse,
You'll get ticked off (or worse!)
By Helen, who says you must rhyme 'em.

[peter2095]

Sorry just had to quickly make it up, will try better next time. and Matt H please don't be offended i just always remember your mum having a go at me everytime i got caught smoking

Praise the lord for our foundation
Lets not praise him for our name
As we sound like stupid kiddies
All look down as we bare shame
Southern’s laughing he can’t care less
On his thousand pound a day
Gladding’s red, he can’t forgive us
His mini’s never been the same

Praise him for the smoking bushes
As it’s our only way out of here
teacher rushing in with torches
Chaos rains with kids aware
1 or two get caught with ciggies
Holdsworths gonna have a fit
yellow card for sure this time now
Please don’t tell mum I’m in the sh!!

[Great Plum]

Serves you right for smoking then!

[DavebytheSea]

Mr Plum, you've heard it before
When writing on this thread, be sure
That every time
You must pen it in rhyme
Because, Helen says, it's the law.

[Great Plum]

^^^
What he wrote

[J.R.]

^^^
What he wrote

The late, great Ernie Wise, Plum ???

[DavebytheSea]

Tut! Tut!

JR and Plum
It's really not done!

Insulting our host,
You continue to post
Unrhyméd prose
(Which uneasily goes
On this topic, where shines
Such poetic lines).

No poetry posted
Will get you both roasted!

So, one more time
WE ASK YOU TO RHYME!!

[J.R.]

Great Plum and J.R. live in Surrey.
Both are partial to curry.
To make our lines rhyme,
takes up too much of our thyme,
as off to the loo, we must hurry !

There ! Is that better ??

[DavebytheSea]

There ! Is that better ??

IMHO
It's awful!
But I know
Even so
That I ROFL

[Richard Ruck]

There came to Christ's Hospital School
A man named Gene Simmons, no fool,
"Over four thousand chicks
Testify to the tricks
I perform with my much-vaunted tool".

But here, Gene, your class are too young
To be awed by the length of your tongue,
And they think it quite wrong
That you boast of the long
List of women who know how you're hung

Gene answers "It's been my good luck
And the lure of the mighty green buck,
I've a face like an arse
But it still comes to pass
That I never go short of a full evening's entertainment".